On January 10th, David Bowie died. Sadly, we lost many other legendary icons throughout the year - Prince, Merle Haggard, Glenn Frey, Frank Sinatra Jr., John Berry, Leonard Cohen, Gene Wilder, Alan Rickman, Muhammad Ali. To name just a few.
Fortunately, February reminded us that miracles still happen as the Denver Broncos won Super Bowl 50 and The Sheriff rode off into the sunset. We've still got amazing talent on the field this season, but I think I speak for most Broncos fans when I say that we miss Peyton.
In June, while the United Kingdom stunned the world and voted to leave the EU, Hillary Rodham Clinton (The Notorious H.R.C.) made history by winning the Democratic Party nomination for President of the United States. I'm no Gloria Steinem, but damn am I proud to be a woman and see that, in my lifetime, the glass ceiling will be broken.
In August, Michael Phelps became the world's most decorated Olympian. I may or may not have shed a tear or two, amazed and awed at his talent - and the talent of all the athletes. Hell, I think I'm the bee's knees if I get up early and ride my bike for 30 minutes.
In November, the Chicago Cubs won the World Series. Let me say that again - THE CHICAGO CUBS WON THE WORLD SERIES! Holy shit. I was jumping around like an idiot, crying, clapping, and shouting with joy. Completely nonplussed, my cats looked at me like I had lost my damn mind. But I didn't care - the Cubs just won the World Series after 108 years. Nothing else mattered...
...until the giant zit that was the Election came to a huge (white) head and erupted. A month later, and I still refuse to believe it happened. More than anything, I wish Republicans would stop saying that we need to give He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named a chance. By that logic, shouldn't we give AIG, Goldman Sachs, and Lehman Brothers another chance? They proved they can't run a business, they lied like assholes, and they completely hosed the American taxpayers. But hey...let's give them a chance to see what they can do this time around! Fuck that.
And the cherry on top? I am turning 40 in nine days. I wouldn't say I'm excited so much... more like I'm dreading it. A lot.
I'm trying to stay positive about all the things I have accomplished and not focus on the things I haven't, but...I think I'd have better success climbing Mt. Everest with my arms tied behind my back.
And so I will raise a bottle of champagne on New Year's Eve, and salute the unbelievably magnificent bitch that was 2016.
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