I ♥ Public Transportation

http://www.buzzfeed.com/copyranter/meanwhile-on-the-subway

I once heard a story about a friend who threw up in her purse on the subway. Kinda bummed that it didn't make this list.

Never Ever Shake a Co-Worker

It's tempting, though.

And there are days (like today) where I'm weighing the options - punch someone in the mouth to get them to shut up, or close my door and do nothing.

I know that physical violence is frowned upon by HR. But it can be extremely effective. Just like Duct Tape.

Глобальное господство

People in Russia read this blog. I also have readers in Alaska. Who knew?

Two steps closer to global domination.

Oh No She Didn't!!!

Someone recently told me about a uniquely horrifying experience she had and I just have to share because it's so unbelievable. This is what happened:

She was in the bathroom at work, headed to the sink. There was a woman in another stall having, shall we say, "issues". And in order to mask the noise of said "issues", the woman started singing gospel songs.

I have several thoughts on this.

First - WTF?

Second - Why didn't she just employ the courtesy flush?

Third - Can you really sing and shit at the same time? I should probably be impressed with such a talent, but honestly I'm just mortified.

Fourth - What is the appropriate protocol in that situation? Run like hell? Pretend nothing is happening? Sing along?

Fifth -  Wouldn't beatboxing or some kind of rap music be more effective at disguising that?

Sixth - Would Jesus be offended that you used gospel music in such a disgraceful way?